Let Other People Do the Talking: 13 Reasons Why You Should Stop Arguing

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Let Other People Do the Talking: 13 Reasons Why You Should Stop Arguing

The term arguing refers to a contentious speech act; a dispute where there is strong disagreement (contestation, disceptation, disputation, tilt and argument) It is use in relation to fight, conflict, firestorm, difference, difference of opinions, dispute. The word contentious means inclined or showing an inclination to dispute or disagree, even to engage in law suit. A dispute is a disagreement or argument about something important. It is also having a disagreement over something. Disagreement is a conflict of people’s opinions or actions or characters. It is a difference between conflicting facts or claims or opinions. It is also the speech act of disagreeing or arguing or disputing. Stemming from the above, the basis of any arguing, is center on opinions, actions or characters. (i). Opinions: A personal belief or judgement that is not founded on proof or certainty. It is a vague idea in which some confidence is placed. (ii). Actions: This is something done (usually as opposed to something said). (iii). Characters: This is the inherent complex attributes that determines a person moral and ethical actions and reactions. Looking at the above explanation, the following reasons are the call why you should stop arguing and let people do the talking:  

1.     There are more than one solutions to a particular problem: As we struggle to go through our problems, we are going to discover that, there are more than one solutions to a particular problem. To discover these solutions, we need to be open to hear and listen when other people are doing the talking. It is better than you doing the talking all the times. 

The truth is that, those who are in need of having more than one solutions to solve their problems tend to be disposed to listen more than talking more. If there are more than one solutions to a particular problem, why arguing with people who have other solutions to the same problem at hand. What if my solution or your solution is not the most effective solution to the problem?

There are some problems that need a combination of two or more solutions to solve that particular problem. In this situation, arguing unnecessary and blindly can prevent you from get the other solutions to the problem at hand. In line with this, I am learning to stop arguing with people anyhow and let other people do the talking.

2.     An individual personal opinion may not actually be the best: Your opinions may not be the best. So, why arguing. Do you know that other people opinions may be better than yours? If other people opinions may be better than yours, why not be humble enough to take theirs. Sometimes, you may not know the person opinion which is the best. It may be yours or it may be theirs, you would not know unless and until they are given the chance to talk.

Why not use the chance at your disposal to stop arguing and allow others to the talking. While they talk, you may discover more than you expect from them by so doing, you have built or increased, your knowledge more. Since, my or your opinions may not be the best, it better we learn to pause and give others the chance to do the talking. 

To make do with the knowledge I have already or to increase or add to the knowledge I have, which is better and more enriching? As a sensible person, the latter is better. If this is the case, why arguing?   

3.     There are more than one way of doing certain things: There are several ways of doing things. Your ways of doing things may be different from that of other people. If your ways of doing things does not aligned with that of others, does not mean that their ways of doing things are wrong. 

You need to be open to learn new things in addition to what you already know. When you are not open, the tendency to be indulging in unnecessary and blind arguing is there. Being open to new ideas helps you to stand ahead of others who are not open to new ideas.

Since, there are more than one way of doing things, it will be wise if you learn to stop arguing and let the other people do the talking.

4.     Opinions are not facts: After all, opinions are not facts. Except proven otherwise. Opinions are not facts, yet people argue a lot. Why arguing on things which are not facts. Sometimes, we make other people look inferior by arguing with them unnecessary. If my opinion is not a fact, why trying to convince other people to accept my point. 

I can only make people to accept my point, if only my point is a fact. But since, my point is not a fact, it is not too okay to keep arguing blindly. If you try to convince others and they are not ready to go with your conviction, be silent and let them start doing the talking.

After all, some opinions are falsehood completely. Why arguing on falsehood. Accepting or sharing such opinions is disservice, to yourself.     

5.     Yourself expression of your ideals must not be accepted by people: People have their different shades of opinions which may be conflicting with yours. And yours may be conflicting with theirs. Your ideas must not be accepted by others. You do not need to force your opinions on people. It is left for others to accept or reject your opinions. 

It is their right. You opinion is just your expressions. Other people around you, have their opinions as well. You are free to accept or reject the opinions of others as well. If this is the case, why arguing with people?

Why not give them the chance to express their views. Since, I know that, my opinions or the opinions of other people must not be accepted by force, it is better to stop arguing and let the others do the talking. 

6.     You do not need to explain yourself to people to seek their approval: Most of the times, no one explain himself or herself in order to seek the approval of other people to do the things he or she does. We do our things the way we want. The time we want the things to be done. All these we do without taking permission from anyone including God. 

You do not need to seek the approval of people before, you can do what you should do to make your life better. You do not need the approval of others to think of effecting the best for yourself. Do you need the permission of others before you can rise and shine?

Since, no one need the permission of people before he or she can shine brightly like a star, why inconveniencing yourself arguing unnecessarily and blindly? Is it not better to listen the more while others are doing the talking?

7.     Arguing is a disagreement which may never solve any problem: The truth is that, arguing is a disagreement which often, never solve anyone’s problems. In short, arguing compound people’s problems. From my experiences, I have discovered that unnecessary and blind argument is not a problem solving tool per say. 

Instead of using arguments to solve problems, people use it on the contrary to increase their problems such as ill-feeling, deep and bitter anger, creating bitter enmity or enemies, increasing one’s sadness and shortens one’s life.

If arguing is a disagreement which may never solve any problem why worrying yourself arguing unnecessary.    

8.     It may or can lead to resentment: Resentment is a feeling of deep and bitter anger and ill-will. Anger shortens one life. Anger is a belligerence aroused by a real or supposed wrong (personified as one of the deadly sins). It is to make angry. It is the state of being angry. It is a strong emotions; a feeling that is oriented towards some real or supposed grievance. 

If a simple arguing with people can cause one or both or all the persons involved in the argument to become angered by the very act of just arguing with one another, is it not wise to let go of unnecessary arguing and let other people do the talking. The truth is that unnecessary argument leads to resentment which is a feeling of deep and bitter anger and which shortens one’s life.

If I know that argument will cause me a deep and bitter anger and that anger shortens my life, is it not best for me to run away from arguing unnecessary and blindly with people. Since, arguing with people can leads to resentment, I think, it is wise to let others do the talking.

9.     Everyone is entitle to his/her own opinions even on the same issues: Everyone is indeed entitle to his or her own opinions even on the same issues. The same issues can be seen from different perspective. You have no right to condemn others perspective or views or opinions. How do you know that your own opinion is the best? What if others opinions are stronger than your own? Will you simply reject people’s opinion even though, the opinions are much stronger than your own? 

Even on the same issues, people are entitle to their opinions. You cannot deprived them to air their opinions. It is their right to do so. Since it is their right to say their mind or what is on their mind, it is equally you right not to say yours, if it will leads to unnecessary arguments. If nobody wants to hear or listen to your opinions, keep your opinions to yourself. You have not lose anything. Rather, it them that is losing. It is better to talk less and listen more.

The better you understand that people with superior arguments should do the talking more than people with lesser arguments. With this in mind, you will start learning to stop arguing and let other people do the talking.

10.  People often get hurt as a result of arguing: Most people often get hurt as a result of arguing. When you are arguing with other people, it looks like a real competition. The winner feel proud of winning the argument while the loser feel demoralized and feel defeated. In such situation, the tendency for the loser to feel hurt is very high. 

In most cases, serious argument often come with hurt feeling of one or both persons in the argument. Instead of giving people the chance to hurt your feelings because of argument why not learn to avoid arguing by allowing other people do the talking.

11.  You do not depend on people’s expectations and opinions: Most of the times, you do not depend on people’s opinions to do your things the best way you think. So, why arguing? You can learn from people’s opinions but you do not need to depend on those opinions. People’s expectations and opinions sometimes, may be conflicting with your ideals and principles. 

Since, you are not depending on their expectations and opinions, why arguing with them. Instead, of arguing with them, learn from them by allowing them to do much of the talking. While they are busy doing the talking you are busy doing the learning.

The question is who is gaining more? You are not depending on their opinions but you are trying to see if there something you can learn from them that is why, it is better, you should stop arguing and let the others do the talking.   

12. Bitter enemies can come out or emanate from arguing: The truth is that bitter enemies can come out from arguing. People who were once close friends are now bitter enemies because of frequent unnecessary arguing. Each person struggle to outsmart the other person with his or her own point of argument without anyone wanting to pause and listen to what the other person has to say. Every one of them is claiming to be right and none of them is accepting to be wrong. 

In the heat of an argument, negative words may pop up and give rise to serious quarrels or fight. Which in turn give room for bitter enemies to emerge. You can see that out of ordinary arguing, bitter enemies has been created.

In order to avoid creating bitter enemies out of ordinary or simple argument, is it not better, you stop arguing and let other people do the talking.

13.  If they cannot learn from you, learn from them:  Sometimes, you will meet people who will find it hard to learn from you not because you do not want them to learn from but because they choose not to learn from you. Even though they are choosing not to learn from you, you can take the advantage to choose to learn from them and enrich yourself better than them. 

When you find it difficult to learn from other people, you will be wasting your time arguing with them. But instead of arguing unnecessarily, why not choose to add to your learnings by choosing to listen to what, they are saying or they have to say. The truth is, if they cannot learn from you because of their own wrong choices, choose instead of arguing with them to learn from them.

By so doing, it will help you to avoid arguing unnecessary with people. You pick the better option by stop arguing with others and let them do the talking while you do the learning.

The above points are good enough as to why you should stop arguing with others and let the others do the talking.